It was approximately 7:47 a.m. on Wednesday, Dec. 18, 2024,
when I started re-thinking about my re-birth day in 2020.
Why? Thank you so much for asking. It’s because we’re nearly upon Jesus’s birthday, and that prompts me to consider the hunk of ~mental meat~ that is: life and death.
Speaking of mental meat, today’s ~food for thought~ is: death isn’t real.
oOOoOO, hot take!!! She spicy!!!
Speaking of heat, my heart rate skyrockets when I think about any dissent from my take on hot topics. Not sure why people ask if I was in Speech & Debate? Like NO thank you @ confrontation. #JustEmilyThings (see also: childhood trauma).
That said, I recently learned to “name my fears and go there anyway” to prove I can conquer them. And that they’re not always true, or good, or useful.
With that caveat, I’ll dive into the hot topic from my ~unique~ vantage point. You know, the one I gained from a near-death experience *smiles, performs a curtsy* :)
So, from a fear-state, naturally (impulsively, habitually),
my first move while re-thinking about my re-birth day was to control my environment and my emotions, and then write about the experience for all of you to enjoy.
How did I control my environment? Thank you so much for asking. I paused my thoughts, and pressed my espresso because … well, #TooBlessedToBeStressed.
What better way to elevate my writing than to suppress my inhibitions and adenosine (the sleepy hormone) with caffeine?
Plus, my coffee is served in a Santa Claus mug these days. This is thematic since the espresso dumps directly into his head. I digress. #JustEmilyThings
happy hollydaze! I gift you bird x coffee art <3 :)
Espresso now presso’d, I grabbed my ~food for thought~ notes,
which total 90,140 words spread across 161 pages, using 11pt Arial font, single spaced. But who’s counting? It me.
Instead of unleashing all 90,140 words on you today, I will instead take you back to the beginning. Not the beginning of my journal … though that blurb is also pristine!
Wait .. hold the keyboard … that journal entry should get its moment in the light! You’re right, I should screenshot and share it! I’ll put it at the end of this post and elaborate later.
Consider this my cliffhanger. Or!! Scroll to the bottom to lose your train of thought :)
For those who want to stay linear, we’ll go back … back to the beginning. Below is a blurb I blurbed at a workshop. I like it, and want you to, too. #JustEmilyThings.
It’s out with the old, and in with the new. Goodbye clouds of gray, hello skies of blue. Yeah, so, that’s a cute song from High School Musical 2, but as I think about the lyrics… I realize it’s also a scene from The Emily Story.
I want to first start by letting you all know I don’t believe in death. Anyone’s but certainly not my own. There’s no beginning and no end to my essence – my energy, spirit, my soul, my power source, you name it. It can’t die. It’s like how when people disappear from planet earth, the woo-woo community (or religious community, if you’re talking about THE Jesus Christ) will tell you the person’s spirit lives on. We could spend hours diving into just that little thought, but I understand I only have about 13 more minutes on this stage.
So, I’ll do my best to stay in my swim lane here.
I do agree with science that there is a beginning and an end to physical things.
This is where, if I had more time and access to an overhead projector and some expo markers, I’d kindly turn the microphone over to human growth and development class and let the teacher awkwardly try to explain to us how a little sperm thing collided with a little egg thing, and wam-bam-thank you ma’am.
I’ll give it to science: this ol’ thing here we call a human body came from human bodies. Yes, one day it did emerge from a woman. Yes, it will one day go into the ground or an expensive ceramic container or something. BUT. What about the life force that powers it? What about the thoughts it can think? And the feelings it can feel? What’s with all that? Does that “die” when the body “dies’??
Haven’t humans been using their bodies to make art for years? Haven’t humans been telling each other their thoughts and feelings for years? Like since before Jesus Christ, didn’t humans expand the broader consciousness of all that’s living? Am I diving too deep here? I said I’d stay in my swim lane, but maybe now I’m ready to hop out of the lap pool and go join my dive team friends?
I can’t say I ever really loved my human body. I could find just about anything on it to pick apart. And while I do need to work on my bad habit of picking my nose and my zits when I’m nervous and anxious, I will instead focus my energy on this story about my near-death experience because that seems more intriguing than zit popping. Though I do hear there’s a whole internet community that likes to watch that happen?
Anyway, back to my body. I took this physical apparatus for a mega spin in 2020. I had the chance to take it away and never bring it back.
One night, people thought I died. People thought I was going to die. But me? I never had a doubt. You can kill my brain cells, but you can’t kill my essence.
I’ll take us back to that song I opened with. It’s out with the old, and in with the new. Goodbye clouds of gray, hello skies of blue. Do you guys want me to ask for extra time and I’ll tell you a bit more about the time I almost died?
I love my inclusion of NASA telescope images to round out the piece. Classic me thinking about presentation value and speaker support.
Back to that meaty ~food for thought~ that death isn’t real. I’m not asking for full acceptance. I’m asking you to pause and consider the energy (power) of your thoughts, and how you want to feel while you’re in physical form.
Now, I don’t recommend a near-death experience before considering
whether your days are filled with thoughts, feelings and experiences that feel good. But I DO recommend thinking about your thinking — and adjusting accordingly.
OooO, there she goes referring to prior Substacks. Why? Our thoughts create our reality. And while I still have a physical reality, I’m going to make it feel good.
And drop some mics (leave some legacy) while I’m at it.
Join me?
Let’s expand universal consciousness together?
Let’s make like Jesus and find ease knowing our life force (legacy) will live on?
Let’s do a little dance … make a little … art?
Let’s consider how we want to feel today … as if it were our last (physical) day?
!!WARNING!! ooOOoo, she’s about to use a Nickelback song to punctuate a point.
XOXO,
-me
*as promised, here’s a screenshot of the opening blurb of my 90,140 word journal:
Mom upside down is wow!!!!